You Can't Un-Introduce the Avengers to
by OkieDokieLoki
Summary: You can't undo the past, no matter how crazy the present gets. This is a total Crack!Fic where the Avengers take on all the strange aspects of modern life, Tony runs for president, Bruce "Hulks-out" over his favorite Doctor, and the news finally mentions something besides football statistics. One-shot, but I may make it elaborate if you guys are interested.


You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to face book – even if they get in a war to see who can gather the most followers.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Avengers-monopoly – despite the fact that there was no "Loki" piece and he sued the company.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Frozen – even if Thor follows Loki around singing "We used to be best buddies, and now were not. I wish you would tell me why" and if Tony starts calling Loki "Man-Elsa"

You cannot un-introduce Steve to America: The Story of Us – no matter how bored everyone gets when he insists they watch it.

You cannot un-introduce Hawkeye to the Fox Song – even if he forces everyone to be part of the music video for his parody, "What does the Hawk Say?"

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Doctor Who – even if there are battles. Everyone is protective over their favorite Doctor, and Bruce is no exception. Neither is the Hulk.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to BBC's Sherlock – even if they start answering every question with "the game is on"

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Thor's Asgaridan customs – even if Tony builds a giant mechanical boar which they hunt through Central spark with spears.

You cannot un-introduce the Black Widow to Assassin's Creed – no matter how may nightmares her playing it gives everyone else.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Lord of the Rings – no matter how many marathons they insist on holding.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to McDonalds – no matter how they ruin the reputation by all going and ordering happy meals. People always ask "aren't you a little old for that?" and Thor always says "You are never too old for happy, Midgardian"

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to pillow fighting with sandbags – until they give each other amnesia.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to democracy – enen if Tony and Loki both decide to run for president.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Divergent – despite the fact that they do a two week version of the Chicago experiment complete with factions. (Tony: Dauntless, Bruce: Amity, Natasha: Dauntless, Steve: Abnegation, Thor: Candor, Loki: Erudite, and Clint: "Factionless because I refuse to be labeled")

You cannot un-introduce Fury to the phrase "Because I said so" – no matter how often he uses it.

You cannot un-introduce Tony to hash tags – no explanation required.

You cannot un-introduce Loki to I'm Joining Loki's Army dot com – no matter how conceded he gets.

You cannot un-introduce Loki and Tony to Staples – even if they both decide to use if for their presidential campaign posters.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to the Hunger Games – but you can stop them from hosting their own, which they were about to do. Whose idea was it for Loki to be the Capitol?

You simply cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Harry Potter – no matter how many times Clint insists that he should have been accepted, and how they continuously divide themselves into houses. (Gryffindor: Natasha, Clint, and Steve; Ravenclaw: Bruce and Tony; Hufflepuff: Thor; Slytherin: Loki)

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to the Agents of SHEILD – even if Tony gets Skye to help him hack into the Electoral College to make sure he is beating Loki in the election.

You cannot un-introduce Hawkeye to Robin Hood – the fox, or the regular one.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to the Wii – even if Thor accidentally throws the remote at the screen causing it to shatter.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to the Constitution – even if Tony elects to use his right to petition to form an online campaign for his face on the fifteen dollar bill.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Cheeto puffs – just ask Pepper. She tried.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to the X-men – even if they get into a Dance Dance Revolution war that ends with the news actually (gasp) forgetting about football stats to discuss them.

You cannot un-introduce Tony and Loki to cooperation – even if they decide to run together for president and vice-president so to make sure the win doesn't fall to Wolverine and Rouge.

You cannot un-introduce Captain America to celebrity endorsements – even if he is on every channel advising against drugs and whatnot.

You cannot un-introduce Bruce to Weird Al Yankovic – and you can't stop him from playing it either. No one wants to get him angry.

You cannot un-introduce Tony to plagiarism – even if he copies and pastes Lincolns Gettysburg address and reads it as his inauguration.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to Fanfiction – you will see in the next few the problems with this.

You cannot un-introduce Thor and Loki to Thorki – they will refuse to be in the same room for the next seven weeks.

You cannot un-introduce Tony and Steve to Stony – see above.

You cannot un-introduce Natasha to Blackfrost – she will actually track down the writers, something that shouldn't happen on an anonymous sight.

You cannot un-introduce any of the Avengers to the internet – there is no going back now.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to April fools day – just ask Coulson. He tried, but he could not get the paintballs of his Captain America shield. (It was vintige!)

Speaking of which, you cannot un-introduce the Avengers to paintball – goes up there with all the other sports: football, ping pong, tennis, dodge ball, ice skating, and skydiving.

You cannot un-introduce the Avengers to team building activities – because they hate them so much, you'll never get to do any again.

And that is why, living with the Avengers is crazy.

**Sorry, some of my stuff was getting too dark and I had to do something during standardized testing (besides math) so here it is. Review. Please. If there is popular demand, I may do another chapter, or elaborate on one of these. Hugs! I own nothing. At all.**

**-OkieDokieLoki**


End file.
